How many times in your life have you heard from others “You can’t do that?”
Before I event grew up, went into jobs or my business, I was told – about various ideas, dreams, tasks –
“you can’t do that”, “that’s not how things are done” or “you have to be realistic.”
I will admit to being a fairly disciplined, realistic and “boring” person. I know my limits and honor them and can rarely be swayed from them.
But I know that “being realistic” and doing “things the way they’ve always been done” leads to complication, frustration, depression and just an unhappy existence.
I live a very simple life. Along the way, lots of people continuously told me some version of “You can’t do that.” Even while I am doing the thing that they are telling me I can’t do. It is amusing (and sometimes scary) that they don’t see the irony of that moment.
If things were (and are) simple, then we wouldn’t have to spend so much time keeping up with the systems, ideas, processes and procedures that serve no one (even the elusive “them) in the first place.
We are constantly and consistently sold the story that MORE is what brings confidence and success. That MORE is what feels good and tells us we’ve made it.
So how come every person who simplifies, who stops chasing the more, is the one who sighs in relief and gets to feel good, feel confident and like they’ve made it?
All of “the rules” and the complicated systems we’ve created within business and life – these systems get in the way – of working, of serving, of being, of life. (I’m also sure they were created by someone who had too much time on their hands and wanted growth for growth’s sake without ever thinking about the consequences, but that’s for another post.)
I did a small deep dive into AI a few weeks ago. I abhorred AI and still do, even after my time with it. I did want to see what it could do, what it’s limitations are and why EVERYONE is using it, saying that we can’t hold back, we just have to embrace it.
No.
At the end of the day, it’s still weird, it’s still creepy, it’s still not accurate, it misunderstands things. And it gives me the heeby-jeebies. I always felt weird about it. I tried it. Now I feel even weirder. Can’t explain why – I just don’t want anything to do with it.
Besides my weird feeling about it, I think about it logically. Do I (and do we) really want this other complicated thing to manage that may or may not be able to do what it promises? Along with all the other things in our life that act the same way that we may or may not be able to opt out of?
All the latest and greatest, all the technologies that make our lives better…have they? I mean, I love my phone and use it, but it is one more thing that I now have to keep track of. And have to constantly stop myself from using. And many days wish I didn’t have at all. (Have you ever tried to use a website that points you back to an app? Ugh. I don’t want to read things on a tiny screen and enter them without a keyboard! We are destroying our eyes and our hands this way!)
Is my phone holding me back? Less focus, less free time, less the boredom where all the good creative ideas come from. Absolutely, it is holding me back. So I purposely schedule myself for time without it. But I have to consciously do that (therefore making my life more complicated).
All of the software and systems, all the people you pay to keep them updated, to manage them, run them (here I am talking myself out of my job)…are they really necessary? Are you using your brain space to manage all of that stuff when you could be doing something else? Are you learning about the latest and greatest, when you would rather be living your life or doing ANYTHING other than “keeping yourself up to date and relevant”?
Reminder: Around absolutely everything is an industry that wants your time and money (making $$ off your time) and sometimes maybe to help you. Are they really giving you the tools to simplify your life? Or are you trading one anxiety for another? I’m not saying don’t engage – there are wonderful, helpful things out there.
I’m just saying “Be careful you are not further complicating your business and your life.”
Imagine what you could do with that time and money, if you went simpler, easier. Imagine how much space you would have in your mind.
If you can imagine it or think differently, why wouldn’t you try?
Don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise.
And enjoy their “you cant’s” as you keep doing exactly the opposite – you can.
I am grateful you read what I write but I don’t want that to be it for you. I want it to help you in some way. So at the end, some questions to think about.
Have you ever had a time where someone said “you can’t” where you knew you not only could but already were? What was that experience like?
Is there something you would love to do (or not do) that you hear the voices in your head saying “you can’t”? What is that thing?
What would the first small (so tiny, 5 minutes or less) step be toward doing – or not doing that thing?
Until next time…
